A Few Open Letters

Dear ABC Suits,

If you’re going to make a police show that blows like Kenny G’s horn, perhaps you shouldn’t include “Blue” in it’s name. The mental link to the great NYPD Blue only magnifies the spectacular suck that is Rookie Blue.

Dear Tryst Management,

I get that maybe you have suddenly decided to be the kind of restaurant that charges people for a refill of drip coffee, but not giving me a warning before my check appears and reads coffee-sandwich-coffee, is like pouring me a tepid cup of lamesauce.

Dear Interwebs,

The social contributions of Sarah Palin and Twitter are of questionable merit, however, the brilliance of the ShakesPalin and BardofWasilla Hashtags are beyond doubt.

Dear Former Major Client,

I know that you knew that I was getting fatigued with all of the travel, but trust me, you bouncing a big check wasn’t exactly the way that I wanted to free up some time.

Dear Tracy from the Vintage Vinyl Shop in Pittsburgh,

Not for nothing, but the Original Pressing of Coltrane & Hartman you sold me was only part of what made my day yesterday… if I was the kind of man who seriously considers the flirtations of married women, I absolutely would have danced with you in the store.

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7 Responses to A Few Open Letters

  1. Brando says:

    Charging for refills on drip coffee–a trend that seems to have started with Starbucks and similar “gourmet” coffeehouses–is a sure sign of the downfall of society. That’d be like McDonalds charging for me to refill my soda.

  2. Lemon Gloria says:

    Their lattes got smaller at some point and I don’t think they’re as good. I used to go there a lot and then there was a large span of time that I didn’t, so this may have happened a while ago and I just didn’t know it. But I think I used to like Tryst more than I do now.

  3. Grace says:

    Charging for regular coffee refills? That is totally lamesauce.

  4. i firmly believe that the only things that should bounce are balls and boobies…
    xoxo

    somebody HAD to say it…
    xoxo

  5. Scarlett says:

    I’m sorry you have so many letters of angst and frustration in your ‘Out Box’, but….they really made me laugh 🙂 Thank you!

  6. kitty says:

    dear mr refugee, please continue posting. thanks, the internet.

  7. Tryst now charges for refills???!!!

    Wow. The District sure is changing.

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