My mother loaned me out on Sunday.
That opening sentence doesn’t seem to effectively make the case as loaned seems a rather benign word. Pimped would be an appropriate term except that in that circumstance I would have at least received some compensation even if a small percentage of the total paid. No, my mother loaned my Personal Chef service to a couple of her friends for a Mother’s Day dinner. It was another example of “no good deed going unpunished.”
I sent my mom to Europe as a Mother’s Day present (calm down, I’m not really that generous; she had a friend from church who was going for business, so the only real expense was the flight and walking-around cash.) As soon as I booked her trip, my mom declared “since you’re not cooking for me, I told your Aunt Sandy that you would make Mother’s Day dinner for her and a few of her friends.”
Sandy is not my aunt.
Sandy is one of my mother’s friends with whom I’ve never had a particularly special relationship. Sandy is, like my mother, a slightly cantankerous 70something black woman who doesn’t understand:
- why I am not married
- what I do for a living
- why I am “wasting” my degrees
- why she doesn’t have more grandkids
- And did I mention why I’m not married? Yeah, she definitely doesn’t understand that.
I was loaned-out.
We made our way through seven courses, meaningless chatter about the aforementioned things that my mother nor Sandy understand, and a couple of attempts to set me up with a daughter at this Mother’s Day dinner. At some point between the last savory course and the cheese board, Sandy came into the kitchen and said “Refugee, everything has been so amazing. I know that your mother is so proud of you, and that she’s really happy you’re here”.
Two of her three declarations were true.
Happy Mother’s Day to all of you (everyone has a mother) even to moms and offspring who have complicated relationships.
…and yes, I know that this post is coming in just under the wire before declaring belated wishes to moms.