Someone Else Deciding What I Write…

This interview has been making the rounds of the blogosphere for a couple of weeks.  One of my favorite Boston Bloggers, MegaBrooke did it recently and I was happy to have her ask me a few questions.

If you’d like to play along, just follow these instructions:
1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.”
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions. Be sure you link back to the original post.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.


1- What is something about you that you don’t think gets too much airtime on your blog?

Oddly, I don’t think I write enough about restaurants on the blog.  I have a list of my favorite places, and a really dated list of restaurant week recommendations, plus a few other notes but; I still have a sensation that I am giving short shrift to that area.  I hope to better about that in ought nine.


2- Do you believe in soul-mates?

Yes.  Unequivocally, but I also expand the definition to include friends.  Romantically speaking I also believe in soul-mates.  I place my chances of finding one at roughly the same odds of being struck by lightening, or winning the powerball.  That pragmatic expectation does not stop me from playing in the rain, or buying my lottery tickets.

Though I believe the universe to have a twisted sense of humor – introducing us to the largely unavailable (geographically, emotionally, etc.) who feel right – I think that most excuses which prevent us from being with the right person are bullshit.  Those who wait for all things to be perfect are destined to wait forever.


3- What is something that a server has done to go above and beyond, guaranteeing a big tip from you?  

Like many current and former service industry members, I am a habitual over-tipper.  Give me decent service and you can expect at least 20%; good service will yield a gratuity as high as 50%; and for exceptional service, I have been known to double a tab.  I should admit, belatedly, that I know or am known by many servers, bartenders, and managers around town and these relationships often yield unsolicited comps which may inflate a tip in relation to a check. 

A few years ago, I was having a particularly craptastic day at the restaurant I was running at the time – a common condition whenever corporate muckety mucks left the confines of their offices and spent too much time in my restaurant.  Rather than inflict my bad mood on my staff and guests, I made the executive decision that both the restaurant and I would be best served if I gave myself the night off.  I found a cab and headed to Cashion’s Eat Place for dinner at their bar.  Upon arriving, I realized I had nothing smaller than a fifty and the driver didn’t have change.  I went inside – cranky with myself and the driver – to get change.  The bartender, like all good bartenders, was slightly clairvoyant because after I returned to the bar, I found a place set for me in the corner I prefer when I want to be left alone and a Manhattan was the cocktail flag that marked my territory.  Sullenness eased with the first sip of whiskey & sweet vermouth but it was erased for good when the bartender wordlessly produced an un-thumbed newspaper for me to peruse.  Reading the paper was a much better idea than reading the paperwork I had intended to be my dinner companion. 

Three incredible courses later, I was contemplating the cheese board to finish the meal and was in much better spirits.  No dessert menu was presented, but the following invitation instead: “Refugee, you just bought that young lady at the end of the bar a port and invited her to join you for dessert.  She’s visiting from New York and I am fairly certain you both could use the company at this point.  Don’t make me a liar; go have some cheese with the lady.”

The bartender and I had known each other for years; we were more than colleagues, but less than friends.  Still he read everything about me and my mood perfectly and introduced to me to a woman who remains a friend to this day.


4- How much is too much?

Too much is the saccharined sweet of arbitrary and unfounded affection.  Too much is a server who says “my pleasure” ten times during a meal in lieu of  giving good service.  Too much is one text message from the person you don’t really dig, and not enough from the person who has you smitten.  Too much is chasing buzz words instead of leading.  Too much is a coffee drink that takes more than five words to order.  Too much is the dress that renders my imagination useless.  Too much is the affected, the unnatural accessory that screams “I am not comfortable in my own clothes or skin.”  Too much is declaring that which should be obvious or discovered.  Too much doesn’t understand that so much is relative. 

5- What would your “warning label” read?

Contents are contraindicated for those who don’t dream, tilt at windmills, or believe in unicorns.  Common side-effects are eye rolling, exasperated sighs, and frequent arguments about the trivial, semantic, or unnecessary.  Also may cause extreme frustration, or profound dislike in severe cases.  Most test users found the side effects to be mild and decreased in frequency with repeated use.

This medication is not for everybody but those who respond to it generally have good to great results.


Oh yeah, since it is Wednesday, I took my turn as contributing editor at DC Blogs. Go on  check out that which moved me more than most this past week.


13 Responses to Someone Else Deciding What I Write…

  1. Lemmonex says:

    I think soulmates are a total crock. I think there are people in which we can connect, but there is more than one of them. I bet there are about 50 guys out there I could marry and be happy with…and I have a zillion friends.

    I agree with you, and I wish that I had made that more clear in my answer to that question. I think that there are at least a 100 romantic soul mates for every person (maybe not Dick Cheney.)

  2. brookem says:

    i knew that i would love this interview. your answer to “how much is too much” was the one i most looked forward to. i knew that you would not give just a short, one word reply. the tale about the waitress introducing you to the out of towner is a winner.

    thanks, rr.

    Thank you for the terrific questions.

  3. 16paws says:

    I love, love, love, your answer to number 4, I want to print it out and frame it so I can read it over and over again.

    The thing that I also should have mentioned is that at numerous points in my life I have both been and courted Too Much.

  4. Brett says:

    So you like people who dream, but not those who believe in unicorns… does that mean you appreciate optimism but not blind idealism?

    And… because of my narcissism, i say… interview me…

  5. Sara says:

    Re: Dick Cheney

    One must have a soul to have a soul mate.

    For the rest of us, I think people come in your life at different times for very different reasons. Someone who may be perfect for you today may not fit ten years from now. I am not sure what that says about lifetime commitment but it is what I believe.

    Then I suppose Kenny G will be alone forever too.

  6. M@ says:

    Ha. Interview me.

  7. Lisa says:

    I believe absolutely in friend soul mates. I don’t know about romantic ones, but friend ones, definitely.

    Sometimes you just know about people… knowing that you will be forever romantically is different.

  8. Foilwoman says:

    I’m going to regret this, but interview me.

    working on questions.

  9. ella says:

    and that is why i drink my coffee black.

    But not in the same way as John Tanner, Justice Dept. head of Voting Rights Unit under President Bush.

  10. Lazygal says:

    Loved the answers to 4 and 5 – and you are spot on about soul mates. Souls evolve, shouldn’t mates?

    If you wanna interview a total stranger, I’m game!

    gotta do some research but, questions are forthcoming.

  11. SingleGirl says:

    This is fabulous.

    I want to play. Interview me.

    With pleasure.

  12. kjohnsonesq says:

    Because Lem’s slacking… Interview me please.

  13. […] silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt,” comes to mind.)  I did this one because it was different and another because it was literarily and emotionally convenient, but when […]

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