If Hating This is Lame, I Don’t Wanna Be Hip

I cancelled my Friday night date mostly because of my indifference towards her but the whiny client and his imagined emergency provided a good excuse that had the added convenience of being true. After mollifying the client, my evening was free. So when my very dear friend, the Only Slightly Sleazy Lobbyist (OSSL,) invited me to join him and a few of his friends at a downtown bar/nightclub, I agreed despite knowing better.

From prior visits I, I knew better than to give Café Lousy Mojito even small amounts of my cash or time but I boredom got the better of me. I arrived in the tween part of the evening – too late for happy hour, too early for the real club kids – hoping to find the sweet spot in the night. I gave my ID to the surly stereotype at the door – black leather jacket, three day stubble, bad attitude – and moved through the more crowded than expected night spot looking for OSSL and crew.

Like most Latin themed places downtown, CLM, had attractive but bad bartenders, too loud music which necessitated near yelling to communicate, and a dance floor populated in equal measure with really good salsa/merengue dancers and gringos just drunk enough to think they have rhythm. Having checked the main floor and the tiny upper level alcove without finding them, I descended the dark staircase to the basement bar and found OSSL easily. An outsize voice, always holding court near a bar, wildly punctuating his point with one hand, and a pint in the other – yeah that’s him.

I was introduced to the crew of five stylish, early to mid 30s gents, and one lady who is “I could boil water by looking at a glass” hot. I am certain that none of them remembered my name because it was too loud for them to have heard it and too dark for my face to have made an impression. I made a point of chatting with each person individually. I sipped a beer that took too long to get from a bartender who couldn’t be bothered to say thank you when I left her an industry sized tip.

I had one more beer because having just one is rude and milled about a bit more, yelled into other peoples ear chatted a bit more. After an hour (or what felt like it,) I grabbed my coat to leave and said my good bye’s. Just as I turned to face the stairs, the Boil Water Hot woman landed on the final step.

“You’re not being lame are you? You’re not leaving, right?” She mock-pouted.

“Yes, I am lame; yes I am leaving. This place just isn’t my scene, but it was very nice meeting you.”

“What’s wrong with Café Lousy Mojito?”

We had been standing at a distance that would have suggested we were intimates if we were on an afternoon sidewalk but simply meant that we were talking in a place like this. I stepped back, met her gaze, and in a normal tone of voice, replied “Nothing is wrong with this place. I just don’t like yelling, and don’t like dancing when there’s no room.”

She leaned back towards me and asked me to repeat myself.

“Exactly” I said returning to audible volume.

She smiled, I winked, we parted ways.

By the by, since it’s Wednesday that means I did the DC Blogs Round-Up.  Go over a take a peak at the posts in the DC Blogosphere that caught my eye.  By the By, this post from Sara who writes If I had to Pick Five would have been on that list but it aint exactly a DC Blog.

One more thing, since I am now a Contributing Editor at DC Blogs, I feel compelled to mention that the December DC Blogger Meet-Up is this evening at RFD at 7pm.  Bloggers, readers, lurkers are all invited – I can’t promise that I will be there (maybe that will induce more of you to attend) but I hope you will.

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11 Responses to If Hating This is Lame, I Don’t Wanna Be Hip

  1. f.B says:

    screaming at close range? just not as fun as it used to be, i guess.

    and Sara does have a great blog

    Definitely not as much fun as I pretended it was all those years ago?

  2. Aileen says:

    Refugee- great roundup today at DC Blogs! By the by (since that is the phrase for the day:) featured blog posts do not have to be a DC Blog. Pat’s philosophy is that he wants DC Blogs to expand our horizons as bloggers…So whatever catches your eye- please share!

    Thank you, and thank you for the tip too.

    p.s. “By the by” is not just my phrase for the day but my phrase ever since I heard Higgins from Magnum P.I. use it and I decided it was so much cooler than “by the way.”

  3. Liebchen says:

    Ah yes, the old “mock-pout” guilt trip.

    I’m curious, did you repeat yourself? And did she get the joke?

    It was more of a playful mock-pout rather then the guilt trip type; and no, I did not repeat myself, and yes, she did get the joke. I really thank you for this comment because it inspired me to make a teeny edit at the end that makes the answers to your questions more clear.

  4. Mandy says:

    I hate Cafe-I-Know-Exactly-Where-You’re-Talking-About with every fiber of my being. Maybe that makes me anti DC and maybe it makes me boring. And maybe it makes me unfashionable. But give me a stained barstool, a beer and an irish pub anyday over $10 drinks and a crowded room full of metrosexual men with too much hair gel.

    I would have passed too. Not to mention, one cannot flirt well if one is extremely uncomfortable in their surroundings, no matter how hot s/he might be. And I’ve often wondered if you’re the type (not that we can’t all have many different types) of girl (or guy) that is most comfortable in dive, low key settings – then what are the actual chances of you meeting someone that you’d click with in a bar that is on the complete opposite end of the spectrum. I like to think – slim to none.

    Birds of a feather, and that sort of thing.

    While we share hatred for Cafe Lousy Mojito, I don’t think that makes either of us anti-DC, boring or unfashionable. To your question of meeting someone with whom you’d click in an environment that doesn’t make your socks roll up and down, I have always assumed that if I am there than it would be condescending to presume that someone I might really like couldn’t be there too. Not saying the chances are high, just that I have long used that mindset to guard against my natural inclination toward condescension.

  5. carrie m says:

    Mandy and I were across the street on Friday night waiting 10 minutes for our $7 Stellas and similarly overly priced liquor drinks. I was treated (read, horrified) to seeing something I really didn’t expect to see at a bar. Later in the night, when it took us another 10 minutes to push our way through the crowds to get outside to smoke where we saw the massive line outside and realized that the crowd would not subside, we called it a night. And ended up on a stained barstool elsewhere. I still had a great time at the first place – b/c I was with my friends. However, I emerged dateless despite many attractive guys because it’s the least conducive (sp?) place to have a conversation.

    I too decamped for another more comfortable local – not so much stained barstools but plenty of stained reputations from the regulars.

  6. Sara says:

    If it is too loud to talk, I am generally uninterested. Even the best witty banter looses something when you have to shout. If I want to listen to myself yell I can hang out at home and drink better wine and bourbon than I am willing to pay for at a bar.

    Whispers always trump shouts.

  7. Angela says:

    i am curious about your indifference towards your original date.

    I am not certain that indifference can be explained.

  8. Lisa says:

    Nice line-up. Good for you for being a contributing editor. And I’m totally in agreement with you – dreadful to meet up with friends somewhere you have to shout. If you can’t hear each other, what’s the point?

    Thank you; and the only shouting that friends should do in a bar is into a karaoke microphone… erm, or not.

  9. lacochran says:

    “I cancelled my Friday night date mostly because of my indifference towards her” begs the question, who forced you into it to begin with?

    Nice dcblog editing. Are you in addition to the existing editors or in place of one?

    No reason.
    *cough*

    No one forced me into it, I talked myself into it. And regarding that other thing…. ummm I have no idea.

  10. LiLu says:

    Every time I’m in a “shoulder to shoulder” bar, I just can’t imagine how I used to be able to stomach it. Must be a gene that fades after you turn 22…

    Only if you’re really lucky.

  11. freckledk says:

    Mysterygirl! and I had a great time at Cafe Mojito one night — but that was in large part due to the bartender handing us a tambourine and instructing us to go to town. Let’s just say that there was some rhythmic spanking going on that night.

    Next time you and MysteryGirl want to have a spank show, just let me know where and I’m buying the drinks.

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