Email & Karma Malfunctions

When LemonGloria wrote of a recent email sent to her new husband by one of his ex’s, I laughed heartily mostly from the uproariously funny manner in which that lady weaves the strings of life into the fabric of poignant humor.  I also laughed at the many speculative reasons one might send an ex with whom s/he has had limited to no contact a picture of you & your spawn after childbirth.  The largely acknowledged reasons had two theories – accidental inclusion or deliberate attempt to demonstrate what one had missed.  In concluded that the latter reason was most probable, I mocked this woman’s vanity, her pettiness, and her general being.

Then karma declared today as the day of retribution. 

I compiled my long email list of invitees to the first ever Bloggerational Ball I am hosting with LivitLuvit and Who Invented Roses.  It was several hours later when I got the email from an ex I accidentally included on the distribution list.  She is delighted to join us she wrote.  I would be more delighted by someone coating my boys in honey and tying me to a colony of red ants than to see her.

I slightly exaggerate.  The problem is I don’t know how much power she still wields over me, and I am not anxious to learn in the middle of a party I am hosting.  I am especially reticent to learn this fact with her dressed in evening wear – I am a sucker for a well dressed pretty face.

So blogosphere, help a man out – play Miss Manners and suggest a graceful manner in which I can uninvited her.

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16 Responses to Email & Karma Malfunctions

  1. You have to send her the info and all that for her to actually pay and attend right? Just forget to do it until it’s all booked up. That’s the passive aggressive way to handle it.

  2. Kevin says:

    Either tell her it was a mistake and ask her not to attend or, better yet, harden your heart and take advantage of your mistake in the back room during the ball.

    Yeah, I said ball.

  3. LiLu says:

    Hmmm. How “accidental” was it, my dear? And it’s true, we do have to send her the payment info, if she actually writes in… we could, ahem, hold off on that for a bit…

    And of course, there’s always honesty. But that’s no fun, now, is it?

  4. Lemmonex says:

    I would just email her back and say Whoopsies. Do you still see her?

  5. lacochran says:

    Send a message to “Distribution” (in this case it’s a distribution of 1) saying that due to overwhelming feedback, the date has been switched to the day AFTER the inauguration.

    Either that or you could have all your women friends fall all over you so she realizes just what she’s missing out on. 🙂

  6. kathleen says:

    gosh, you’re making the whole event sound more appealing.

    which was the whole point, wasn’t it?

  7. Michelle says:

    blame it on pay pal 😛 refund the payment and say there was a problem !

  8. Lisa says:

    I’m so flattered! Thank you so much!

    As for the ex, I would opt for honesty – oops, it was a big list. BUT I feel like maybe you subconsciously would like to see her, or have some contact…so unless it would possibly be a kick in the heart to see her, maybe see how this renewed contact plays out?

  9. Sean says:

    Well, if she reads this post, you may be OK!

  10. Ohh, this can’t end well. I find it odd that she is going to this ball. I wonder if she’s trying to find a date who will make you jealous. Girls are dumb.

  11. Well … hell, now I’m tempted to pony up the cash just to see if there’ll be a cat fight!

  12. kjohnsonesq says:

    Oh dear… Well the co-host in charge of The List, I could always screw it up. Accidentally, of course.

  13. Trust you’ve moved on and if you haven’t, pretend. If I can pretend my ass is smaller than it really is, you surely can pretend she isn’t as relevant as she once was. Of course, it doesn’t hurt to keep a very elegant lady nearby during the entire event. Call in a favor to a good lady friend who makes excellent arm candy. Her only job is to act the part if necessary. She should have a nice rack, full lips and turn heads. You know, this idea sounded a lot less superficial in my head.

  14. Brett says:

    Tell her oops, sorry, didn’t mean to send it to you but the other [insert name here]. She’ll get over it.

  15. You can go two ways.

    1.) Be honest. Explain that you put together this celebration for a specific group (you might not want to admit bloggers because she might want to start reading yours) and her name was inadvertently to added to the list.

    Apologize for this mishap and stress that you hope that she will be spending the day with “her” close friends to celebrate; or

    2). If she doesn’t get the hint, then email her that’d it be a “cold day in hell that you’d want to celebrate any event with her in your presence”.

  16. scottstev says:

    While first reading this post and the inspiration for it, I thought “how in the heck do these people find their exes so easily?” Then I broke down and created a Facebook profile. Riddle solved.

    Seriously, if you’ve been the dumpee, Assume he/she is doing great, and never wants to hear from you. You’re an embarrassing episode from the past. May or may not be true, but just because you have the opportunity for “closure” doesn’t mean it will turn out like a Romantic Comedy.

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