Open Letter to a Few Women in DC

27 August 2009

I understand that there is a not insignificant portion of the men in this city who seemingly strive to harass, objectify, and verbally abuse you.  I get it – I really do.  The best I can express is sympathy as I am not a woman and empathy is not possible.  My understanding, however, does not grant you or anyone license to display rudeness in the face of civility, hostility in the presence of cordiality.

A few of you deserving of special mention:

To the redhead at Starbucks this morning, despite your protests about my motivations and desire to “check out [your] ass,” I assure you I was simply holding the door for someone I mistook for a lady.

To the power suited woman rocking the red pumps in Kinkos, if a gentleman says “I love your shoes,” then a thank you is a more appropriate response than “I’m not interested.”

To the Plain Jane married woman at the seafood counter at Whole Foods, when I asked what you were planning to do with the Skate, sneering “Making it for my husband” only makes me doubt the existence of a man who would marry you.

To the past her prime platinum blonde who I encountered sitting at my local, it had been a really long day for me.  I had just finished working/cooking the bulk of the evening and had endured the indignities and accusations from the aforementioned women throughout my day and I still found enough civility to offer you a light without speaking a word.  I know that you “can” light your own cigarette, and can state the obvious.

None of you, however, can change me.


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