I Got Five on it Friday – Volume VI

16 January 2009

 

First things first, I, Poppa freaks all the… wait that’s not what I meant to say.  First things first, Katertot, LiLu and I would still really like the pleasure of your company at the Bloggerational Ball – it’s free, no excuses (and you know that there is some dress/tuxedo/suit in your closet that is feeling unloved and begging to be taken for a night on the town.)  Email BloggerationBall@gmail.com to RSVP. 

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It has been a while since I have had a Five on it Friday, perhaps because I recently discovered Amy, who writes If I had to Pick Five and consistently employs the Five concept with greater aplomb than me.  Anywho, time for another…

 

Five violations of etiquette that will make me want to lash you with a chain of paperclips

  1. Initiating a conversation on speaker-phone
  2. Being late without calling
  3. Failing to say thank you for courtesies extended, both common and uncommon
  4. Being so self-important that you think it remotely acceptable to park in a travel lane during rush hour
  5. Needlessly correcting someone in public

 

Five favorite renditions of patriotic songs – thanks Vittoria for the inspiration

  1. Marvin Gaye’s National Anthem
  2. Ray Charles’ America
  3. Louis Armstrong’s What a Wonderful World (patriotic in my mind at least)
  4. Jimi Hendricks’ National Anthem
  5. We are the World (cheesy and dated, but still makes my chest puff and no need for a link)

 

Five Favorite Sentimental Things I Will Never Discard

  1. The band from the cigar I smoked after leaving the courtroom for the final dissolution of my marriage
  2. The cork from the champagne I drank the night President Elect Barack Obama accepted the Democratic Party nomination
  3. The first thank you note I received from a guest at a restaurant
  4. The bottle of wine Mrs. C brought to the restaurant because we took Mr. C dinner every night while he was sick and she had to be away* – we didn’t do delivery but if you knew the C’s you’d understand why this was our honor and pleasure
  5. The menu that Charlie Trotter signed for me after my first dinner at his restaurant

 

Five Favorite Misconceptions about Me (from this blog or not)

  1. I eat fois gras and caviar every night
  2. I don’t like any bar where the drinks don’t come in a crystal cocktail glass rimmed** in platinum flake
  3. I hate all republicans
  4. I won’t drink inexpensive wine
  5. I take myself seriously

 

Five Favorite Sports Related Phrases/Sayings/Quotes

  1. A tie is like kissing your sister
  2. Reporter: Do you think you all have a shot against X Team; Coach: Of course we have a shot; we’re the only ones playing them
  3. Lou Holtz giving his pre-game speech to his Notre Dame football team right before playing Jimmy Johnson’s University of Miami Hurricanes: “They don’t like us and we don’t like them.  It’s going to be a battle out there – they’re going to hit us and we’re gonna hit em’ right back.  Blow for blow, never back down.  We’re gonna go out there and whip their asses in their own backyard; but do me a favor……… leave Jimmy Johnson to me.
  4. Reporter: Are you going to pitch Johnson in the opener? Baseball Manager: Johnson, are you kidding?  He’s so banged up right now, I wouldn’t trust him to throw a fight.
  5. I’m tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money. I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok – Shaquille O’Neal

 

Five Stories in the News I Don’t Think are Getting Enough Airplay

  1. Potential NFL first round draft pick opts for Rhodes Scholar – NFL can wait
  2. Outgoing President George W. Bush’s Justice Department violated numerous laws, and departmental policies in hiring
  3. Virginia Man uses millions of dollars of his own money to host an Inaugural Ball with free tickets to disadvantaged Americans – and he’s providing attire, hair stylists, bells and the whistles too
  4. Rachael Maddow – nuff’ said.
  5. Time for reader participation – you tell me what story should be the last on this list.

 

 * buy me a drink and I will tell you the whole story

** I know that 62.5% of you giggled at the word rimmed

 

Prior Editions:

Not Quite Five on but I Include It Anyway

The Official Volume I

Also Not Quite a Five on It but I Include It Anyway

Apparently I Don’t Count So Well Because This is Volume III

Volume IV – Just Go with the Wacky Counting

Volume V – In for a Poorly Counted Penny, In for a Miscounted Pound


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